In a shocking yet entirely predictable move, billionaire and part-time internet provocateur Elon Musk has launched an all-out offensive against the judiciary, arguing that due process should be replaced with a crowdsourced Twitter poll. "The legal system is too slow, biased, and, worst of all, doesn't let me post memes in the middle of a trial," Musk tweeted, while simultaneously announcing "X Justice," a premium feature where users can vote on legal verdicts—for a small monthly fee of $8, of course. Legal experts are baffled, judges are sighing, and Tesla shareholders are checking if they can sue Musk using his own service.
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